4 Blind Meeces

I volunteered to house-sit for my friend this weekend. She has a nice house and 2 sweet little doggies. No problem. It's a pretty nice set up so I don't mind. Now, I show up last night and there's a car occupying space in the driveway. I'm puzzled. Turns out, it's her mother's friend. Her mother's "a-little-nutty-friend". My friend had given her a key so that while I was at work on Thursday and Friday, she could let the dogs out during the day. It was too late to back out now. She already saw me.

She's a little stumbly makin' her way to the door (when I could have easily opened the door with MY key).

Her: Oh hi Lori.
Um...KelBel, but whatever.
Her: You're staying here right?"
Me: Yes. And....you"
Her: Oh, I got into a fight with (insert husband's name).
Me: Oh, ok.
Her: (Insert my friend's name here) didn't tell me I could stay here, but I thought since no one was here I'd have a few beers.
Me: Uh, ok.
Her: You're not going out tonight.
Me: No (thanks for making me feel like a loser).
Her: You don't mind if I finish my six pack do you? I don't want to go home yet.
Me: Oh...well no, that's fine.

Well, I checked out her bag of cans she was going to take home so as not to leave trash here (?) and there was at least a 12 pack in there. She stayed and finished her "6 pack" and helped me finish mine too. All the while complaining about how gross she thought my Corona's were. She had me cornered and telling me her life story and crying and then trying to set me up with her son, whom I've known since kindergarten. I mean, no offense, but if I had ever wanted to hook up with him, I would have done it by now. Not such a catch, that one. She kept repeating how overweight he was, was that supposed to make me more interested?

Well, so then she moves on from him to his friend. His friend who is really nice until he starts drinking. He drinks and gets obnoxious, agressive, and just plain nasty. Never met the guy but she spoke so highly of him. Then she tells me she wants me to meet the friend. But not at night, during the day when he hasn't been drinking. Uh, excuse me... and HOW is this supposed to be appealing to me?

So, she finally left around midnight. Yeah, midnight. That was enough for me.

Woke up this morning and went in to feed the dogs. I hear somethin' a-rustlin'. I stood there for a second and I see this mouse scurry from one side of the hall to the other. Great. But, I still hear the rustling. So, I get the broom (of course, what else would I use) and I hit the bad of dog food. More rustling. One of the dogs comes in (a Lhasa Apso, so cute) and he's just looking at the bag. All of a sudden, another mouse jumps out of the bag and plops into the dog food bowl. The dog tries to get it, but no such luck.

So, I'm thinking, well at least I can put the food in the bowl now. More rustling. Damn, another one? So, I proceed to hit the bag with the broom. Rustle rustle. Hit. Rustle rustle. Plop, into the bowl. Dog chases it, loses it under the washer.

Ok, NOW I can feed the dogs. I pick up the bag of food and go to pour it, another mouse plops out. Dog is chasing it. Mouse is running frantically, right at my bare feet. I'm screaming just like you'd see on any cartoon (although I don't really think they're scary or anything...gut reaction I guess?) and jumping up and down. Dog is still chasing it and I dropped the bag. Spilled damn dog food everywhere. Damn. I finally got it cleaned up and I took off.

I call my friend and she says "Oh yeah, I know. I put down traps."
Uh, how bout letting me know before I freak out at the strange noises in the house when I'm supposed to be alone??

So far, my weekend is off to a brilliant start!!