Some fools never learn

I must sound like some kinda lush. At least, that's what they were telling me last night.

What was the occasion? It was Thurs Day! Need I say more;)? Actually, there's this big golf tournament this weekend (Ray Mickens Champions Fund) and so like 12 former and current NFL players were out at a sports bar here making an appearance. So we made an appearance to get a look at some of these guys.

They all sat and signed autographs and stuff and we just drank and tried to figure out who was who. I know Tony Tolbert was there, and Dat Nguyen, Anthony Dorsett, and some other people I didn't know. We had some beers and took some shots.

So, we're about to leave and there was this guy who had been making "eyes" at my friend the whole time. We get up and he flashes her his pearlies and she reciprocates. And then she leaves. And we're standing outside and the guy is still totally staring at her! So I tell her to go talk to him. She freaks out and can't do it. So I take my friend Richard (who is gay) and go back in. Then I don't have a speech prepared, and this is so 7th grade (Do you think my friend's pretty? Check yes or no) so we walk right past them and go to the bathroom. Prepare something to say, come back out, and....they're gone. Oops. Shit. Oh well.

We go to some other bars and have some other drinks, lots of other drinks. We hit 4 more bars I believe, with a few drinks at all of them. Fast forward to last bar. I was drunk. I didn't even want another drink. I just wanted the sweet, beautiful taste of good ol H2O. So, my friend and I sit at the bar. Here's the way we think:

Her: I feel bad just ordering water, taking up bar space.
Me: What do you want to do?
Her: Should we just order one drink and share it?
Me: Ok, or we could get shots, they're small (WTF?)
Her: Ok, what should we get?
Me: Umm...something not too strong. How about an Oatmeal Cookie?
Now, for those of you who don't know what an Oatmeal Cookie is...it has Butterscotch Schnapps, Bailey's (not too bad but probably not the best after all the other stuff), Firewater (ick!), and Jagermeister (ick!). Yeah, that's smart.
Her: Ok!

So, since we felt SO bad ordering water we ordered shots with each water. Now, if the irony is missed by you, let me 'splain. The fact that I needed water at all means that I definitely didn't need a shot. But we had a couple.

Then, what do you do when you're wasted and done for the night? Go EAT of course! Stupid stupid stupid. First of all, my friend's brother orders a pitcher of margaritas! WTF? So, we gorged on chile con queso, tortillas, chips, salsa, and fajita tacos. And margaritas. I don't really remember anything after that. My friend told me I just kept saying "I can't move, I think I'm dying." Yep, one of those nights.

And here I am, hungover again. Surprise surprise! I had to go and pick up newspapers and they gave a stack of whole newspapers vs. just the section we're in. I'm lugging what felt like 100 pounds of newspaper down the street in downtown trying to make it to my car without falling into oncoming traffic. Our sales rep at the TV station told me she could smell the liquor. Grrrrrreat! I didn't even leave my house this morning until 8:40! I can't wait 'til today is over!!!! Martini, I'm counting down with you but for different reasons obviously;) 5 hours and 45 minutes!

Oh shit, I just remembered it's Friday the 13th (imagine scary "ree ree ree" music).