I have to leave work early, I forgot to put on deodorant

So, I walked around for the entire first 4 hours of work with my zipper down. How did I not notice this? There was no draft and it was not windy outside. The question is how did other people not notice this? Or better yet, how come those bastards didn't tell me?

It's one of those unspoken rules. You tell someone those kinds of things to save them from further embarrassment. I mean, yeah it's embarrassing when someone's like "Hey, um, you have a little....thing...in your nose" or "There's some kind chive-looking thing taking over the front of your mouth" but at least you won't unknowingly be "the guy with the booger" or the "girl with that green thing stuck in her teeth". Or in my case "The girl who likes to show off her Austin Powers underwear through her fly". I mean, am I right or am I right? Do you tell someone that? Even a stranger? I say yes.

So, I'm trying to think of a reason to get out of work early today. I just can't be here anymore and since I'm ALWAYS here, I think I've earned it. I don't think the "I forgot to put on deodorant" excuse will work, unless they're OCD over here, but I've been wracking my brain trying to come up with something and this is all I could come up with(or steal from various sources).

- Constipation has made me a walking time bomb.
- I have to take my biological clock in for service.
-I think I left the refrigerator on.
-I have a seriously overdue library book that I have to return.
-I need to check out the hole in the ozone layer.
-I have to leave work early today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for leaving work early.
-I just found out that I was switched at birth. Legally, I shouldn't be at work knowing my employee records may now contain false information.
-I prefer to remain an enigma
-My stigmata's acting up.

Any ideas? I need to get outta here:)